Life in Wonderland

Being a single mother of two boys and working full time is what some people refer to as insane. Me, well, it's just another day in Wonderland. Think Alice in Wonderland, where there is only a smidge of reality. Yes, there are bunnies in real life, but none that pop out of a hole in the ground and tell you to hurry and find the singing yellow spotted toad.
While some people "just don't know how I do it all", I haven't a clue how mothers stay at home and stay sane simutaneously. Seriously. I'm home for two days in a row with my kids and I'm willing the neighbors to come outside so I can "happen to take the trash out at that very moment" just to interact with someone above the height of 48".
I'm still relatively new at this gig; as far as time goes; the "honeymoon" period of single motherhood, so to speak- so under a year. Therefore, I am allowed to have nothing to eat in the fridge at a moments notice, simutaneously lose a kid and my car keys and forget to call someone back for three months (which just happened last week). While there is no written rule, I am maintaining this "honeymoon" period until at least June to get my shit in order. I'm almost there.
There are some things that I am anal about to make my weeks go by without me wanting to drown myself in the bathtub in gin.
For starters, I try to organize meals for weeks at a time so I don't come home and have to get two boys who can't find their shoes they just had on for an entire day back on so we can hit a greasy dive four nights a week. Some nights it's pork tenderloin with veggies my kids won't eat, other nights its Spaghettios. But at least it's on the list and in the house. Somewhere.
I pack their bag for their father's house when I'm doing laundry on the weekend prior so they are ready to have fun in Testoterone Land- five days in advance. I find great joy in getting that bag ready sometimes (see paragraph two).
There is a routine the boys follow. Every day. This keeps us all from not losing our shit and wondering what day it is. Homework, dinner, play, bed, bath and beyond. You get the idea.
Finally, everything goes on my work calendar. Everything. If it's not on my calendar, it doesn't exist. Want to chat with my best friend in Texas on a Wednesday night ten days from now and oh, add in the time difference and a collective of four kids (between the two of us) getting to bed and sleep on time so we can pop corks simutaneously 2,000 miles apart? It has to be on the calendar- if not, I forget to charge my cell phone, don't see the calendar reminder to call and decide to have my neighbor over for Mommy Time instead. And putting everything on my work calendar also exposes all the crap I have to remember to the rest of my office (unless I choose to make my 47 reminders "private appointments") making me look like I don't have two short term memory brain cells to rub together. Oh well, I say. My kids are dressed, my house isn't on fire and I still have time for work.
More to come from this career mom on the go. Next stops- crack like dependency on my SUV, apples and how far they fall from the proverbial tree, 1,000 questions, Evening Mommy Time (EMT), and a special guest appearance by Wendell my middle aged, guitar playing, really loud speaking, grease monkey neighbor. Stay tuned.